From Grief to Giving Back: Using Poetry to Support Kidney Disease Patients

Dr. Tapasi Saha, a nephrologist or kidney doctor, is used to comforting others—patients facing kidney disease and families navigating the challenges of dialysis. But when her mother passed away, Dr. Saha found herself on the other side of grief, unsure how to navigate it. 

That’s when she rediscovered her love of poetry—an old passion that led to something bigger than she ever imagined: a published book, a new way to support her patients, and a mission to give back.

From a young age, Dr. Saha knew she wanted to be a doctor. But it wasn’t until her second year of residency that she found her calling within kidney care.

“I spent two months working in a dialysis and kidney care clinic,” Dr. Saha said. “I fell in love with the field and the patients. That’s when I decided to pursue nephrology (kidney medicine).”

When it came time to apply for a fellowship, Dr. Saha set her sights high.

“I applied to the University of Missouri School of Medicine, Columbia one of the top schools for nephrology,” she said. “Dr. Nolph, one of the leading experts in the field, called me for an interview.”

Dr. Nolph is pioneering physician in the peritoneal dialysis space. 

“When Dr. Nolph called to offer the job,  I was quiet,” said Dr. Saha. “I was so excited I almost passed out. When I realized it wasn’t a dream, I told him I accepted the position.”

After completing her fellowship, Dr. Saha taught nephrology at East Carolina University for seven years. Today, she serves as the director of dialysis centers, the lead practitioner at a kidney care clinic, and an honorary faculty member at Eastern Tennessee State University.

Learn who makes up a kidney healthcare team.

Between raising children and practicing medicine, Dr. Saha’s early passions, like writing poetry, took a backseat.

“I used to write and recite poetry when I was young,” she said. “I loved it, but was too busy to write. I was studying, practicing medicine, and raising my children .”

Everything changed after Dr. Saha lost her mother.

“Her death shook me to my soul. Her memory haunted me day and night. Her absence felt like a lost limb,” Dr. Saha said. “I was desperately looking for a way to release the pain.”

One day, the words came—and with them, her first poem in years.

“Letter To My Mother”

To Sriti Kona Chowdhury

Whenever I think about the fact that I can never see you again

My heart fills with a dark cloud, and breaks so that I can hardly breathe

Missing you, I feel drained and powerless all day long...

But to tell you the truth I always carry you in my heart

And I always feel your presence inside my soul

When I am sad, I feel that you’re patting on my back

When I am happy, you are my dancing heart

(Excerpt from “Letter To My Mother,” page 14, Our Ultimate Destination by Dr. Saha)

“Poetry is the antidote for my stress,” said Dr. Saha. “It’s like a comforting hug when I need one the most.”

What started as a form of personal healing quickly turned into something more. Dr. Saha began writing poems for loved ones going through difficult times.

“A local newspaper published a few,” she said. “My patients found them and brought the paper to their appointments for me to sign. They asked when I would publish a book.”

The encouragement was uplifting, but figuring out how to publish a book felt overwhelming. Dr. Saha started researching her options while continuing to share her poetry with patients.

“One patient had lost both her children months apart,” said Dr. Saha. “When she came in for her follow-up visit, she could barely speak—she was drowning in grief.”

As a mother herself, Dr. Saha felt the pain. She offered to read “Letter To My Mother” as a means of comfort and to show her she wasn’t alone. 

After hearing the poem, the woman stood up, placed her hand gently on Dr. Saha’s head, and said, ‘Your poetry gave me the best comfort a grieving mother could ask for.’

Are you struggling with a kidney disease diagnosis, dialysis, or transplant? NKF is here for you. 

Connect with a trained NKF Peers mentor who understands what you are going through. 

One day, Dr. Saha was on a run when an unexpected encounter changed everything.

“I was close to my house when a large husky started running after me,” she said. “He was big, and I’d never seen him before, so I was scared. I ran faster, but he kept following me.”

It turned out the dog, named Balu, belonged to her new neighbor, Trudy Peters.

“The house next to ours had just sold. Trudy came over a few hours later to introduce herself and Balu,” said Dr. Saha. “She asked Balu to shake his paw with me. That’s when I knew he was friendly.”

The two women quickly discovered a meaningful similarity—they were both writers.

“I had dreamed my new neighbor would be a writer,” said Dr. Saha. “Then I learned Trudy is a children's book author.  I couldn’t believe it. She asked me to share my poems with her.”

Dr. Saha sent one and waited nervously for Trudy’s response.

“It brought tears to her eyes. She asked for more,” said Dr. Saha. “She loved them so much she decided to help me find a publishing agent.”

Trudy connected Dr. Saha with David Turner at IngramSpark Publishing.

“They promised me we’d get my book published—and they did,” said Dr. Saha. “Our Ultimate Destination is now available to purchase. From the bottom of my heart, I'm thankful to both of them.”

For Dr. Saha, poetry is not just a personal outlet—it’s part of her purpose.

“I write poems inspired by–and for–the people in my life, including my patients. My patients championed me through the publishing process and are now purchasing my book to share with others,” Dr. Saha said. “I want to give back to them.”

That's why Dr. Saha is donating all of the money raised from her book to NKF. 

“NKF does amazing work for kidney patients and professionals,” Dr. Saha said. “This is a way for me to support their mission.”

Dr. Saha’s book may be titled Our Ultimate Destination, but this is just the beginning of a new journey. 

“My next book is already in the works,” Dr. Saha said. “All sales from any book I publish will go to NKF so I can help further the mission to end preventable kidney disease, create new treatments, and fight structural inequities in the kidney care space.”